Letter for Future Self Vol. 02
When someone compared you to the sibling who worked in tech industry, know that any industry in current day and age is probably as volatile and unstable as yours - the art industry. The fact that they decided to glorify the tech industry was because they keep seeing the media from third-point of view and all they did just pushing people around and then thinking 'this is for the best of you' when in fact they never included yourself in that thought.
When someone decided to say that art field has no prospect in the future, know that it's more of a mirror of how they didn't see they would not support a human artist. They are not the one who should convince; you know that there are legit people who support you both as a community and monetarily - focus on that instead. Be grateful that they exist and they keep supporting you, and that you'll support them too. The fact that you spent many years to find belonging in people who support you no matter how small, is still amazing.
Remember, they could have spent their time and hard-earned money somewhere and yet they still want to support you as an artist
When you feel jealously creeping up to you because your sibling earned more because they worked in the tech industry, reminder that jealously is an emotion which means it's an information to yourself than something to be ashamed of; When people heard your sibling worked for the tech and earned way more, you felt that tinged jealously - You know that you worked as hard as your sibling, you know that you worked so hard to be independent off any platform and you persisted despite everyone's saying about you; This means that you wanted to be appreciated and you didn't get any from these people.
It's not your fault of your sibling, in fact your sibling could have been in the same situation if they were you. Here's the thing: while it sucks that you had to deal with it, you got exposed to it and I believe you would overcome it eventually that it becomes something to add in your toolbox.
I know how much you'd want some direction, but I think you'd already done enough well, and I hope you didn't lose what your heart desired and eventually felt like your life is exactly spent what and how you wanted.
You will figure it out, and you can count on me to build the future you wanted.
Warm regards,
From your Past Self