In Performance Casting, a Character Play comes first before the Costumes
After listening to Anna Howard's Youtube Video that is more spontaneous, how the client she worked with did so much overplanning for a year to make a podcast, but never recorded one. Anna said that she practices herself before the Wild Geese podcast, to press record even if it's imperfect. Basically to make a lifestyle around what you already have.
It got me thinking about my relationship with Costume Play (or people like to call it Cosplay), how at first I thought I had to have the most completed and the most perfect costume, when In fact I could have made people believed that I am a fictional character even with what I already have.
However Cosplay especially in local scene here is often associated with 'attention grabbing' or 'the dramas', and of course this is due to the social media algorithm favors the spicy takes more than the slow-pace crafting. When the rage-baiting post is rewarded more in the social platform than the slow-paced crafting, most of the times it feels like all cosplay doing is just creating drama. While those group of people do exist, but usually I don't hangout with those kinds of people anymore.
I'm not going to talk about the bad apples here. I want to forge a new path where I want to change that narrative for myself. I want to create my own narrative that I prefer the term "Costume Play" or "A play in a costume" more. It just feels right.
In Theatre Performance during audition, a character must come first without the costume. Then then after everything almost final, the costume comes in. People can believe your play with what you currently wear. And I love that
Just showing up, in my room, although imperfect
After long day at work, I decided to just put my green vintage dress and then take a photo of myself regardless of the lighting setting. The idea just to make a time and lifestyle around the idea of doing slow "Costume Play". And so I did, I felt magical for sure.
And then slowly I was like, what if I just put the wig on that I commissioned someone to style? The idea is truly, to slowly amp-up the comfort zone from the dress, the wig, and also the full costume + wig. Take the photos regardless of the light setting and how it looks.
The idea is just show up. I still feel uncomfortable wearing the full costume because how hot it is too. But it is something. Confidence is a skill that can be built. Memories started to washed in because how much I felt like I was treated at conventions like an afterthought. Men quietly laughed at me as I don't fit to their boxes of stupid 'standards'. We dress in costumes not to fit into the 'boxes' of should-haves. My existence right now is prove that I am still human, and how I look it how nature is intended to be. There is no need to change in my outer appearance.
I don't need to satisfy the algorithm nor anyone. Gender is a societal construct, and I want to be the art on my own way. A play in my costume, in my own way, is my own unique art. I can define it myself, and I want to believe in myself and my own performance.
And from that, I believe I can make the others believe in my play too.
Thank you for reading my blog post, and here are some photos that I took for that showing up session. I'll see you on the next one!
